“Actions speak louder than words” is not just a quote. It’s a fact.
Thought that words are the most important part of communication and is what we need to pay attention to? Wrong. Why? Because everyone has a way with words. It isn’t that hard to keep your real intentions hidden when conversing with someone. Therefore, what we need to pay attention to is body language – the unspoken element in a conversation that exposes our true emotions and intentions.
Being able to decipher a person’s body language can make us aware of the real meaning behind a conversation. It can, at the same time, be useful to us, helping us adjust our own body language so that we may seem more inviting, friendly and interested in our interactions.
Here’s our top 5 body language movements to look out – if not for deciphering someone’s intentions then at least for having some fun ‘observational’ moments.
Caught in a lie
Eyes can be a portal to a person’s soul. Okay I made that up, but seriously! The eyes can communicate a whole lot more than words and gives off hints to what a message and its speaker is really trying to convey.
So, you know how everyone says if a person is avoiding an eye contact, it implies they’re lying. You’re wrong. We humans find it so much easier to tell a convincing lie than say the truth (accept it, you’ve thought this too at some point). Now, a person can look right into your eyes and lie so good, you won’t even doubt it. But have no fear. There truly is more than what meets the eye.
Constantly looking over to something during a conversation can be an indication as well. For example, looking over to the door can imply the person wants to leave. Looking at someone can imply your/their desire to talk to that person. Another behavior to look out for is the direction the eye moves to while thinking. Looking upwards and to the left implies that a person is genuinely telling the truth as the movement suggests they’re trying to recall an actual event. Contrariwise, if a person looks upwards and to the right, then watch out! They are up for lie as the behavior implies they’re imaging and trying to come up with a convincing story.
Mirror on the wall
Mirroring involves impersonating the other person’s movements. And it is a good sign. Mimicking your movements is a sign that he/she is interested in the conversation and wants to build a bond with you. It’s an unconscious movement that is likely to go unnoticed by the concerned person. Try changing your stance to see if you’re being copied – maybe take a sip of your drink and they do the same.
Where are you pointing at?
A part of the body that goes by unnoticed is… *drumroll* the feet! The reason messages are unintentionally communicated through the feet may be because so much focus goes on controlling their facial expressions and upper body movements that important hints are exchanged via the feet.
If during a conversation, whether sitting or standing, the person’s feet is pointed towards you, it’s a good sign. It means they are interested and hold a promising opinion of you. Alternatively, if, despite the upper body showing a favorable behavior during the interaction, the feet are pointed in another direction (especially the door) it means they want to leave. That’s your cue! Either make the conversation interesting or stop talking all together.
How fast (or slow) a person nods their head during the conversation indicates their level of patience. A slow nod implies that your company is enjoying your presence as is interested in the conversation and wants to hear more from you. Fast nodding implies the opposite, meaning they want you to stop talking or give them a chance to speak. Tilting the head sideways implies a sign of interest while tilting the head backwards (along with squinting of eyes) implies suspicion and doubt in your words.
It’s all crinkly!
I see you smile but it doesn’t reach the eye, so what’s the point? (I should be a lyricist). Anyways, it is said that when a person genuinely smiles, it reaches their eyes. This is true and, according to me, is the easiest behavior to analyze. The difference between a fake smile and one that lights up your eyes and puffs your cheek is not hard to miss.
In South Korea, the term ‘eye-smile’ is a famous term used for K-Pop idols. Eye-smile is when you smile, and your eyes form a crescent moon shape. It is considered to be extremely cute among the crowd and also shows your genuinely happy. Another word is ‘smize’ – a term created by Tyra Banks which means to smile with your eyes. Cute, right? Now you know when someone is genuinely interested to see you and converse with you or is it all a façade.