6 Sizzling Confessions of a ‘non-millenial’

Reality check: Have you ever come across a baby-boomer who felt like they’re trapped inside the body of a millennial? No? Well, you’re not alone. Out of the 60 something million millennials that infest today’s zany world, at least 10% of this “fun and frolicking” cohort is jam-packed with what I like to call “non-millennial” millennials. Yep, you heard it right. Finally, a voice for the voiceless minority, I suppose. Nothing to be ashamed of, really. The feeling’s mutual. So, zig-zag your way down our lane and discover our “not-so-millennial” selves.


1. For Pete’s sake, turn off the freakishly loud RAP music



For REAL! Some of us don’t bombard our tympanums with Snoop dog and T-Pain paranoia: Nothing irritates an ‘I-am-not-a-millennial’ millennial than sauntering down the hallways of a mall and listening to freakishly loud rap music. Whilst our hipster crowd sways their hips to such funky rhythms, we run away as far as we can for dear life. This might sound super crazy but our safe haven from rap ridiculousness might be those foogly woogly yellow children’s trains in which they play “the wheels on the bus go round and round” kinda nursery rhymes.


2. The yonder years of music, still burnin’ an eternal flame



Well, as the saying goes “OLD IS GOLD”. Judge us if you must, but we’re hardcore fans of classical music. By that I mean, music of the 70s, 80s & 90s. Nostalgia kicking in, I must say. What tops our list of spare time fun is turning on some cool & funky “oldies music.” It definitely sets the mood right for when we have that one assignment that’s impossible to crack or that one heart-break that seems super difficult to get over. The world just seems so much more like us when the classical “SWAG” hits those radios. Bruce Springsteen, ELO, and the Bee Gees… our hearts beat for y’all.


3. Outdated slang is bae



Let’s get this nice and clear – modern slang like “YOLO”, “ROTFL”, “Bae” and what not are NOT in our dictionary. Instead, our conversations are filled with outdated slang and what you might consider as “nonsense” spoken by typical hipster kids of the 90s. So, terms like “Wallflower”, “Cruisin’ for a bruisin’” and “Razz My Berries” are alive and kicking in OUR not-so-little world. *coughs*

Don’t ever think, even for a second, that we confine ourselves within the walls of the yester years’ word trends, without the urge to bring about change and renewal. We modernize slang in our own creative way, thus classifying us as individuals who keep up with and contribute dynamically to inevitable linguistic evolutions.


4. TEA-REX’s all the way



Yep, tea brings out our goosebumps-triggering sense of humor. Like, “why did the teapot get in trouble? Because he was Naught-Tea”. Or, “what drink keeps you on the ground and not floating? Gravi-Tea”. Look, even the Tea-Rex finds it funny. If we yearn for a “positive-vibe” generating drink, TEA is the answer. If we’re looking to unleash the writer in us, TEA is our answer. If we’ve got those overly-busy work & study schedules that drive us nuts, TEA is our RELIABLE SAVIOUR. Black tea, white tea, raspberry tea with a hint of lemon, and green tea with the soothing goodness of mint, does wonders for us – be it a stormy night or a cold winter morning.


5. Torn jeans, Yankee doodle tops & crazy hair are an absolute NO



The “No way jose” full house darling means business. Put the cutest smile between the torn blue, loosely threaded gap of your jeans? NO, we still won’t fancy them. Put the cutest bunny ears on excessively vibrant tank tops and T-shirts? YES, we’ll walk away. Flashy hair colors like pink, green, blue, yellow and red are not exactly our absolute favorites. But hey, we’ll still love and cherish those whose fashionista tastes aren’t completely in-sync with ours. At the end of the day, we’re one and the same, despite our clothing and hairstyle quirks and clashes.


6. In a world that is bruisin’, books are a soothin’



Till death do us part. Take a stroll down the hallways of our ivory towers. What you’ll find there are piles and piles of mind-blowing literary master pieces. It’s true. We have books that surpass the stars in the galaxy.  Our childhood, our nerve-racking brainstorming sessions, our craziest narratives and our Aristotle philosophies resonate from a magical haven, also known as the library. No wonder Stephen King said that books are a uniquely portable magic. They truly are.

Try flipping through a couple of pages and you’ll see films better than the LED screen experience. So, first things first. Find a cool spot – the shadowy place under an oak tree or even the Starbucks cafe. Plug in your earphones and read away, until nature re-awakens to welcome a bright and miraculous day.


Sneha Maria Thomas is a 20-something Abu Dhabi based Indian who is an ardent logophile, a motivational speaker & a budding French language aficionado. She is a student pursuing a degree in French Literature at the University of Sorbonne, Abu Dhabi. Currently interning at her dream media firm, BrandMoxie which she says, has given her an exemplary opportunity to better channelize and hone her writing skills & creativity as well as develop an in-depth awareness about the many issues that our world confronts on an on going basis. She actively contributes in creating relevant creative content for BrandMoxie's Feel Your Tempo magazine.

Unknown Sneha fact: In 2016, she published a book of poems titled "A Ray of Hope," available on Amazon, iTunes & Barnes and Nobles and a host of other online platforms. Interested in tasting some of her poetic goodness? If yes, click the link below: https://allpoetry.com/snehamariathomas

As for future publications, Sneha is working her way through yet another chef-d'œuvre which narrates a true life story that is intended to awaken the world as its theme touches mankind in a subtle yet profound manner. To be published in less than a decade.
Feel Your Tempo