By Shakir Hussain
The Chairman will breakfast this morning at our house in Emirates Hills. The summer heat is almost gone and we will breakfast on the patio overlooking the lake.
He had practically invited himself for breakfast. I had asked him to come for dinner but he said he wanted to have breakfast instead. I blushed and he noticed it and added that he will come for breakfast on his way to work. Did he make a pass at me? He was sly, looking down. His round face frozen like that of some guru aware of the follies of the world.
To prepare this breakfast I had to wake up at four o’clock this morning. I also had to wake up Vanessa, the Filipino maid. She did wake up, but she cursed the Chairman.
‘Keep a civil tongue,’ I said, ‘if you want to keep your job.’
‘Madam, what do I care? I have not been paid for months.’
I explained to her that the Chairman will solve all our problems. Her salary will be paid and there will be no need to sell this villa. He controls a bank.
‘He will squeeze you before you squeeze him, this kind of man,’ she said.
I wondered why she hated him so. Perhaps he had also made a pass at her.
We went into the kitchen. I had bought free range eggs and honey from Hadramaut Mountain, Shitaki mushrooms, goat cheese.
‘I want you to make a dream omelette,’ I said, ‘light as a cloud inside but crisp on the outside and sprinkled with coriander.
‘If the omelette was only for him, I’d spit in it.’
Then the door rattled and it stopped me from scolding her.’
‘Go and see if he’s come.’
She went and returned a minute later.
‘Nothing. Only the wind, Madam. And did you really expect him to come this early?’
The wind had swept over the lake, circled the house and come to the door. It was still dark outside. I began to prepare a fruit salad. The cherries reminded me of that heroine who was trying to save her Cherry Orchard. But this man coming for breakfast was no Lopahin. He was some monster.
‘Last time, he pinched my bum,’ Vanessa said. ‘I opened the door for him and the moment I turned my back he pinched my bum.’
‘Are you sure it wasn’t an accident?’
‘How can you pinch someone’s bum by accident? You show me.’
‘I am in no mood for a demonstration, Vanessa.’
‘I just want you to be careful, Madam.’
‘We have to be pragmatic here. The man is no angel, but he can….’
The doorbell rang.
‘Open the door, Vanessa, but be careful.’
‘Perhaps with this chopping board I can protect my bum.’
That precaution was not necessary, after all, as the caller turned out to be the baker who had come to deliver fresh croissants. Their smell was good.
‘If Madam opens a coffee shop I will be a waitress.’
‘Still need to borrow money.’
We heard the call for the morning prayer.
‘I guess he’ll come after the prayer,’ I said.
‘Does he pray?’
‘His sort always do.’
‘What if he doesn’t come’ said Vanessa.
‘Don’t even think it.’
He doesn’t want breakfast. Only made a pass at you.’
I raised my hand.
‘Go on, Madam. Slap me.’
‘Not before we eat a good breakfast,’ I said.
‘We eat here, in the kitchen?’
‘No. On the patio overlooking the lake,’ I said.
‘And the Chairman?’
‘We are not waiting for him. Perhaps he lost his way.’
