By Angelique Goldsworthy
Every expat knows what it’s like to leave a piece of them behind. Most of us have sold or left behind all earthly possessions, except for that precious 30kg of luggage allowance. We also left titles, reputations or positions in the community that we’d worked hard to achieve over the years. Certainly, each of us left family and loved ones behind. Of course there may also have been ‘baggage’ we were only too happy to leave behind. Nevertheless, no matter how bright the future seemed with that dazzling, tax-free salary and bargain-priced SUV, we still arrived with some sense of loss… the feeling that we’d let go of something precious forever. Perhaps Bob Dylan had us expats in mind when he sang: ‘How does it feel? To be on your own, with no direction home, like a complete unknown, like a rolling stone…’
At first when meeting people I felt the need to justify myself by mentioning past achievements; what I’d done back home. But soon, life in the UAE took shape, new memories were made, new friendships forged, new roles adopted… I forgot what WAS and started focusing on the NOW. An old proverb says ‘a rolling stone gathers no moss’. Life as an expat gives us the chance to travel and explore new things, to live creatively and learn from that ‘university of life’. In that sense, we are typical rolling stones; you could even call us rock stars! But if ‘gathers no moss’ means to not accumulate new friends or possessions, well then expats are NOT rolling stones for long. I know this for sure, because after six years in Abu Dhabi, we recently moved back to South Africa and I realized just how deeply our roots had grown.
Before moving we decided to sell our furniture and take only a few boxes of irreplaceable items collected on our travels. I advertised items for sale on our compound’s Facebook page. Over the next few weeks our villa became steadily emptier and I got to meet tons of amazing people. Many locals and fellow expats arrived to bargain over a sofa or kitchen gadget and ended up staying to chat. If only I had realized before that my neighbors were such amazing, friendly people!
Each farewell over the following weeks, from lengthy lunches to brief goodbyes, was a bittersweet affirmation of the beauty and depth of the connections we had formed. From my closest girlfriends to the ex schoolteachers, from my church group sisterhood to the hairdresser and laundryman, each one made me realize how extraordinary our UAE experience had been. Perhaps it’s through sacrifice that we gain the most. By shedding our previous support systems we expats arrive in Abu Dhabi free of those previous laurels upon which we rested; we are forced to connect with others in the same boat or rather ‘fresh off the boat’. So yes, we do accumulate some green stuff…we rolling stones quickly ‘gather moss’.
