For the most part, parents believe their kids know how to study. They go to school to learn just that. They do not need assistance in that department. In fact, a study released in 2014 entitled, The Broken Compass: Parental Involvement with Children’s Education suggests that, starting in middle school, parents helping their kids study may actually bring scores DOWN. Yipes! They found that most of us have forgotten how to do what the kids are learning and get in the way of newer teaching methods.
We all have this burning desire for our kids to excel. We say it’s to help them have a better future. That’s partly true. The rest of the dirty little secret is that we see their success as a direct reflection of the quality of our parenting skills. “Her son gets straight A’s, she must be doing something right,” those are the words we long to hear, am I right? While I have enough courage to write a parenting column, I admit that I am in perpetual search of that particular kudo. Unintentionally, this makes for added pressure during exam time. I find pressure counterproductive, so I asked my posse of moms what they do to encourage a highly-efficient, lowest-possible stress environment for exam studying. Their overwhelming response was that we can help our kids better focus during their study time by taking charge of break time activity.
Here are the highlights from the posse: the most common thread seems to be laughter. Veronika says, “We plan silly exercises during study breaks.” Get them giggling. Learn to juggle, set up a fun obstacle course, or watch a brief comedy clip. Donna agrees, “Funny books, movies, or taking time during breaks to find something humorous to laugh at helps at our house.” Has your child seen the parrot scene from Monty Python? Let them laugh off the stress and return to the books with a clear head.
Another theme is exercise. Suzanne suggests, “Particularly for an afternoon study break when the kids are feeling drowsy, getting up off their chair and making the heart beat faster always helps my kids.” A walk outside, choreograph a favorite song (which might put this idea under laughter as well), or a swim can be a terrific change of pace. Play ball with the dog outside. Do a yoga video. Endorphins released during exercise help evacuate stress and encourage focus of attention. Other ideas that arose included baking muffins, gardening and doing a favourite craft activity.
I was pleasantly surprised at the lengths these moms go to in order to create a better study experience for their children. Each of the activities mentioned involved family togetherness as well. We can leave them alone to study but show our support when they emerge for a break. That just might be the recipe for our kids to be able to put forth their best effort.
by Heather Long Vandevoorde | @hvdvoorde
