By Nancy Bercaw | @nancybercaw
I have been making the same mistake over and over again for the last six months in Abu Dhabi. No, I haven’t been putting my foot in my mouth or wearing the wrong thing—at least I don’t think I have. Instead, my crime has resulted in my own punishment.
Here’s the story:
At the grocery store recently, I headed over to the cleaning solutions aisle for a bottle of laundry detergent because our big supply had run dry. I stared at the laundry-cleaning options for a long time. I picked up each version and read it over and over again. Every single one said “softener” plus some other words in Arabic. I tried to figure out the right “solution” because there was no “detergent” per se. What was it that I got last time?
Is all laundry detergent here just called softener? You say potato, I say Golden Russet. But why do all these bottles feature pictures of babies? Detergent is basically softener for adults, right? But all of these scent options? OK, this must be cultural. People here love to smell good and wear fancy perfumes. I’ll just get this one that says, “Eco-friendly for sensitive skin,” because we’ve all been a bit rashy since we got here.
So off I went to the next aisle to look at the lunch boxes, imagining that I would try harder to pack healthy options for my son every day instead of letting him buy food from the school canteen.
I felt like a perfect housewife all of a sudden. I can live in the UAE and find my way. I cracked the laundry code without anyone’s help! Some people would have freaked out, but I accepted the softener v. detergent ambiguity for what it is. Things are not always what they seem! Accept what you can’t understand! Look at me — SUPERMOM! Wait a minute, wow, whoa, hang on…look at that!
Across from the lunch boxes were dozens and dozens of laundry DETERGENT options. You know, TIDE and ALL and FAB.
And then it hit me—for six months we’ve been washing our clothes exclusively with fabric softener. No wonder we all sneeze like crazy when we open the washing machine and lay the clothes on the rack. No wonder our skin is itchy all the time. I’ve been filling up the whole detergent compartment with that ding-dang liquid instead of using it sparingly.
You know what else? Excessive use of softener will harden your laundry. My socks have been like shoes for months and I’ve wondered why. Sigh.
Back at home, I put the laundry in the washer with actual detergent. But was left wondering what else I’ve gotten wrong. Or, even worse, what might be wrong with me. Somehow I’d convinced myself that all detergent in the Arab world is called “softener” because that was all I could see in front of me. Heck, I could have eventually passed this nugget of “information” on to other expats.
Be warned, newcomer, you may be confused by the softener aisle. Fear not! It’s detergent by another name! The scent may be a bit strong, but no worries! Fill up your machine and keep your family clean!
I wonder what little discovery is next.
