Patients

Talking to patients can sometimes be the hardest part of my job. How? Well, I ask a simple question and I usually expect a simple answer. But usually, something else happens. I may get an answer to a question that I haven’t even asked! For example, Q: “Please point to your pain,” to which I could get an answer something along the lines of  “Sure, I love hamburgers.” Or I would be subjected to the LONGEST possible answer to the question instead of the concise answer I expected. Or I may get the half-truth. And sometimes I get NO answer (“you just don’t feel like answering that question, precious?”)

The half truth? Come on guys, help me! I often say that my best and easiest patients are those who simply can’t talk to me. They can’t and don’t confuse the story, thus I can get right to business. However, the drips and drabs of information usually offered up just kill me.

Consider the usual car accident scenario: some guy comes in by an ambulance. The ambulance tech has some information, the kid will tell me what he wants to, invariably hiding details. And his buddies will add or contradict what the awake patient is telling me…

This does NOT help me piece together the broken jigsaw of a story. Remember, I am here to help you but on most days, especially between 2am-8am, my psychic telepathy is weak, and YOU need to tell me:  just the facts, just the answers, to the questions that I have asked!

I am not a cop, or border control, or a target killer. I am just nature’s middle-man.

I can help you, but it takes two to tango. And you are NOT off the hook unless you’re in a coma!

By Dr DMS

 

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